DEAR TINY VOICE, I'M LISTENING...

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POV
Your friend is talking about this new show she started to watch, she's obviously so excited about it and you appear to be listening.
Friend: I sincerely didn't see it coming guyyy
R: Huh? 
I'm pretty certain we've all being in a situation like this, countless times in fact.

Becoming aware that there's in fact a voice within always trying to tell me something feels exactly how it feels to be called back to reality after I've completely zoned out. Now I'm like, "wait! for how long you been there??"
The last week of December 2021 was a very emotional one cause it really felt like I received all of the lessons the year has been trying to teach me live and direct during that week and that led me to the utmost realization that to be honest nothing would actually ever happen to me or any human in fact except that you are to pick up significant lessons from it. I'll liken it to a treasure hunt, pick up your clues so you would know where next you are headed and of course you are armed with more  knowledge on how to possibly navigate the next turn. So, energy was on pointttt, ready to, you know, smash 2022. Laughs in "your mind is your biggest enemy" and vladdy daddy 😞

It's been chaotic to say the least, time really does fly when you don't know what's going on in your life, what do you mean we are in the month of June already!.
I've never been one to look on the bright side of things, it takes effort, so tell me why in the middle of all of this I find out that there's been a teeny tiny reminder that always seem to pop up anytime I seem to be spiralling saying "something good is coming out of this". To be honest I don't think much of it, I just acknowledge that "oh, that's new" and move on. 
I can't remember if it was a video I watched, I just know the phrase "re-invent yourself" came up and it's been living rent free in my head. I also don't pay attention because I am a chronic worrier (you no overthink reach me, I promise) so if that thought is not about the millions of things that could go wrong, I don't want.😩. 

I think I finally "hear" when it kept asking me to confirm how something looked before I go ahead to replicate mine, this didn't happen once but I actually didn't confirm with the picture, I just went ahead😬 and then came back to check only to realise I could have made things a lot easier for myself. That's when the dots finally connect and it fully dawned on me that I've pushed this voice off for the longest time. Pushing it off most probably because I genuinely didnt think I had "intuition", "you are too simple-minded fam". Usually when someone talks about how their guts are always right I usually couldn't relate. Now it's obvious that I do have a gut of my own I just didn't rate it, negative emotions have been the order of the day for the longest time that I didn't trust that, that voice could be found within me, that I could have my light too. 

I enjoy depth so I wouldn't let this realisation just go, I want it to have a deep meaning, I want it to stay with me forever. I started to take note, I started to listen and everytime I did it fostered trust and confidence because I'm so used to failing myself right? and now it's literally teaching me how to nuture it and by so doing I'm helping me too because now I know that my positive thoughts are mine and not foreign and that I can put my two feet on the ground whenever I might need to and be firm, like I'm actually capable of doing that.

Did it take my world to literally turn on its head to listen? Yes.
By listening does my upturned world start to have meaning? Yes. 

What did it take you to start listening, how much strength does this voice really give to you? 

Comments

  1. Tessy3 June 2022 at 16:35

    Well.....you know, I actually have this tiny voice within me but I barely barely listen to it which always comes at a cost; heavy or light. But when I do! It is in fact mostly right.
    Me and my friend have this in common and we call this voice in our head 'SOMETHING'. And countless times we have exclaimed with regret, "and something was telling me to do otherwise".
    Apparently, 'something' is mostly right and it all drags down to trusting that we indeed have insights and intuition.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous3 June 2022 at 16:37

    Vladdy Daddy really isn't doing us right.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous3 June 2022 at 23:43

    This is so trueeee

    ReplyDelete

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